Email Template Review:

Email Template Review:

This outbound template comes from Template found on:

Overall Score: 1.5/5.0 

TL;DR: This seems to be a translated American template that may have been designed to highlight the capabilities of an email automation tool more than best practices in cold email outreach in Germany.


Google translation

Subject line: How to avoid [customer problem] and achieve [solution].
Hello [name],

I am [your name] from [your company]. Is your [company name] struggling with [specific issue]?

This is a difficult problem to overcome that afflicts most companies in [Industry] and can cost up to [Statistics or Research].

Our [product/service] helps you avoid the problem by offering [benefit in one sentence or less].

I would be happy to explain more on the subject. Are you available for a quick chat on [date and time] next week?


Subject line

We generally like this type of highly specific subject line. Of course the risk is that it can be over-precise. Additionally, this type of email is unlikely to get a referrals. {Note to self: We need to analyze in the coming year what percentage of meetings were the result of a indirect referral rather than just a normal target person responding}



(Cold) Email conversations in the German language are still very formal. Especially in the enterprise space. You don’t say “Hallo Doris”. Instead you say “Sehr geehrte Frau {lastname}”. And here’s the point: when you reach out in the correct form in German language you have to know their gender:

female: Sehr geehrte Frau {lastname}

male: Sehr geehrter Herr {lastname}

This template is likely based a bit too strongly on American patterns.



In most cases an email will be first read (and deleted) on a smartphone. Make it easy readable with max 90 words. Don’t waste your words with redundant information like “I am [your name] from [your company]“. The recipient already knows that from your email address and from your signature. This is especially true with Technical and Financial roles and in German markets in general– get to the point and treat their time as valuable.


Credibility & Curiosity

Is your [company name] struggling with [specific issue]? Apart from a severe formal error (“Is your BizXpand struggling with…”) you haven’t yet gained enough trust to ask that question. Better is to say “We hear from other companies in your industry that they struggle with [specific issue]. This build credibility and curiosity.


CTA – Call-To-Action

Are you available for a quick chat on [date and time] next week? We constantly A/B test CTAs in the German speaking markets and for some reason asking for a specific date has very poor results despite this type of CTA working on English language markets.



Despite all the customization, this template does not at all feel professional nor authentic. It feels like a translation of a US template that might be designed to show up the capabilities of an email automation tool. The subject line has some interesting risk taking that might work but this should deployed with an A/B test alternative that is less risky.


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